Invisible Wounds – Naming Emotional & Coercive Abuse
Life has a way of leading us through hidden corridors—unseen scars from old patterns, disempowering beliefs, and relationships laced with control and quiet coercion. These aren’t always obvious. They don’t leave bruises. But they shape our reality just the same, often redefining how we view ourselves and others. In a raw and powerful conversation on Episode 28 of Soul Therapy, Coach Carly shares her own reckoning with these invisible wounds and how naming them became the first step toward genuine healing.
For years, Carly moved through emotionally abusive relationships without recognizing them as such. Like many, she equated abuse with physical violence. “I thought because I wasn’t being hit, it wasn’t abuse,” she recalls. That belief isn’t unique—especially among people who are deeply empathetic or in the healing professions themselves. But the truth came into sharp focus when she encountered the Power & Control Wheel during domestic violence training. The wheel laid out the full spectrum of abuse: emotional manipulation, financial control, social isolation. Suddenly, it all clicked. The behaviors she had endured were not just “unhealthy dynamics”—they were abuse.
Carly’s personal journey didn’t stop at relationships. She also found herself in emotionally demanding professional environments, particularly within trauma-saturated fields like corrections. Years of pushing through left her depleted. Burnout crept in quietly but forcefully, building into chronic pain, nervous system dysregulation, and a body that could no longer pretend. Her body, she says, started to speak louder than her mind. And finally, she listened. “You can’t grow when you’re stuck in survival mode.” Her breaking point became a turning point—a moment where everything had to change.
Through this unraveling, Carly began to reclaim a deeper truth about relationships and selfhood. “It takes two whole people to create a truly healthy relationship,” she reflects. True partnership isn’t about someone filling your void. It’s about showing up as your full self—healed, aware, and no longer operating from codependency or past wounds. Wholeness begins within. From that place, we can relate with clarity, boundaries, and deep presence.
This conversation isn’t just a personal story—it’s an invitation. To name what’s been unspoken. To question the narrative that says “if there’s no bruise, it’s not abuse.” To listen to your body when it tells you it’s had enough. To recognize burnout not as a weakness, but as a signal. And to honor the subtle and powerful tools that support real healing—nervous system regulation, energy work, and inner listening.
There’s freedom in naming what was once invisible. And in that naming, you create space. Space to breathe. Space to choose something different. Space to remember who you were before the wounding—and who you’re becoming now.
If this spoke to you, listen to Episode 28 of Soul Therapy and hear Carly’s story unfold in her own words. And if you’re ready to begin your own healing journey, explore how we can work together at chellegriffin.com/work-with-me. You don’t have to carry your invisible wounds alone.